No Cards for 1 in 4.

Now that I’m a loss Mom I’ve become deeply involved in a lot of Loss Mom Communities. I’ve made friends. I cheer for these women as they get their BFPs and I pray for them and give them virtual hugs on their bad days.

Just recently I gave out some virtual hugs and prayers to a woman that I have gotten to know through a Life after Loss group. I felt a kinship to her because she lost her first child, a daughter due to an incompetent cervix and pPROM (premature pre-term rupture of the membranes) in July of 2011. Four months ago she was blessed with getting pregnant again, amazingly enough with twins, twin Girls.

Just a few days ago her water broke again and her little girls went to heaven. We were all devastated for her and her family. And I ask that if you feel so inclined to life up her family in prayers, I know they need every single one that they get.

I remember when Elena died a few people sent me cards and I loved getting them it was nice to know that people cared. So while I was at the card store I stopped to pick up a sympathy card.

And this is what I found:

Click to Enlarge.

There are FOUR cards dedicated to the loss of a pet. Two general and one each specific to loss of a cat or loss of a dog.

One card dedicated to the loss of a child. One to the loss of a son and one to the loss of a daughter. There were NO cards specific to the loss of a pregnancy or a baby. and the rest were all generic.

Is this how taboo pregnancy and baby loss is? Are there seriously cards for losing a pet but none for losing a baby? Are there seriously more cards for the loss of a pet than loss of a child?!

What is wrong with our society?

1 in 4 women will lose a pregnancy or have a child that dies before the age of 1.

1 in 4.

But don’t go to the Hallmark store if you need a card for one of these ladies. You won’t find anything there.

Instead you can visit the Etsy shop Loss Remembered or the Lost for Words Card Line.

I hope you never need these resources but in case you do. They do exist.

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  1. says

    I’m so with you. I had a conversation with my pastor about it. Why is it so taboo? And, why are we as the moms so ashamed? It’s not like we did anything wrong.

    So sorry for your friends’ loss. It’s devastating.

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