Borrowed Time

In just two short days Mason will be one. In one day I’ll be 24. Not too old I know but it feels like I am! Especially since last year I spent the entire day in labor. So turning 23 was more about laboring with Mason and less about me. Oh the joys of motherhood.

I’m struggling with my thoughts and feelings about all of it. I’m so excited for what the next year is going to bring for both Mason and myself. I love that as he gets older the more things we’ll be able to do together and  that he’ll be able to express himself even more. 

But the older he gets the further away I get from this moment


The further I get from getting snuggles whenever I want them and the closer I get to him wiping my kisses off. 

I always wanted to be a Boy Mom. I wanted my first baby to be a Boy. But it’s different with boys. You’re on limited time. They most likely won’t grow up to be your best friend unlike little girls. 

We’re on borrowed time with them. So while I’m excited for what’s to come as the year{s} fly by I’m also reminded that I don’t have forever with him. While he will always be my little boy one day he’s going to grow up to be a man and his best friend will be his wife, not I. 

So I don’t take for granted that he still wants me 99% of the time, or that he still wants to nurse, or that he falls asleep in my lap, that he co-sleeps or that when he gets upset the only person that can make him feel better is me. Because it won’t always be me. 

But for now it is. 



A boy and his Mama. 

Because You Love Me Him! 🙂
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Comments

  1. Darcy says

    I think even with little girls we're on borrowed time. But you wrote a sweet post. And you know, I think he'll be closer to you than if you didn't BF & cosleep.

  2. Emily @ Baby Dickey says

    Awwwwwwwwwww, I started crying. It's so true and so sad! I know our sons will love us and be close to us, but it's definitely different than girls. Mother and daughter shop together, gossip together, talk on the phone together. Those aren't "boy" things. RYAN, STOP GROWING! Mason too!

  3. Candace says

    This made me cry too! I hate thinking about my little boy getting older and not always wanting me! But I love seeing him grow and explore the world. Happy Birthday to your sweet baby soon!

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